L.O.N.E. and LONErs

I used to live there...in the Land of Not Enough---L.O.N.E for short.  Maybe you've been there, to the place where nothing and everything is "Not Enough"?  Those that live there are called LONErs. The houses are built on streets named money or time... tall or skinny... talented or smart.  And none of these are enough.

I moved around a lot in this land.  You don't get to move out when you get enough...when you are enough.  Enough of one thing just moves you to a different street.  It left me with very few relationships.  I was too busy being jealous of their enough and judgmental of their not enough.  I had to spend much time on covering my not enough as if it didn't exist.

Fear is the favorite mode of transportation in the land... moving you from one place to another.  Joy rides don't exist there.  And the weather is dreadful.  Dark and gloomy... wind always howling.  It is a vacuum where all "enough" is constantly sucked away.

At times I invited my friends, family, even my children to live there with me.  No one really wants to be alone, but in the land of Not Enough you never feel together.

Throughout my life in this land there were many opportunities to move out. There were times I heard of a better place...a voice offering a different way. I couldn't really imagine another way to live. Another place free from striving and working and fear. These seemed too good to be true.  I mean who would really want me to live in His Kingdom?  Does He know that I am worn and weary and my best... is never enough?  Does He realize that I would be a burden... a total fixer-upper?  Does He know that I am not worth it?

Still He beckoned come... and so I did.

I relocated to the new Kingdom many years ago.  Working hard to love Him... to love others.  Doing my best to be obedient.  Seeking to build my understanding of how to live here.  Trying not to require too much of the King.  All the while I kept the baggage of unworthiness hidden in my closet.  It was the last thing I brought from the old land.

I thought He wanted me to live in the Kingdom.  I misunderstood the invitation.  This was not about being a resident of the Kingdom.  This was not just about relocation.  This was about adoption.  He intended from the beginning that I would be His daughter... even royalty.  I didn't realize it and I certainly didn't know how to live it.

And so this is the story of a girl who once lived in the Land of Not Enough. A girl rescued by the King.  A girl letting go of fear, risking all she knows to live as a daughter of the Most High.  A girl free to live... enough.